Tuesday, March 29, 2011

PERKS OF DELIRIUM

As a police/911 dispatcher, our days are typically long. Some are longer than others when you have back to back shifts. By the end of most days, I'm pretty pooped (this pun is hilarious if only you'll keep reading). And working with a bunch of guys, well, sometimes it can get pretty raucous at the station. Especially after a long night.

Take, for instance, one particular day I worked 17 hours. I was tired, physically and mentally, and I'd been cooped up in the comm center (which we lovingly refer to as "the box") for 17 straight hours. I came in before the sun was up and I was leaving after the sun had set. So... I was pretty much a walking zombie when I gathered my things to head out for the night.

On this day, we had cake for an officer's birthday of which there was 1 single piece left at the end of the night. So, I decided to take it home for my daughter. It was in a cake holder container -the kind that had those useful little handles on the lid for easy toting. I figured I'd just take the whole thing home with me, wash it, and bring it back to it's owner the next day. Unfortunately, because I do work with a bunch of neanderthals men, someone hadn't secured the lid properly after having their share. And when I picked it up the bottom fell off causing the piece to tumble down and plop squarely on the floor- frosting first.

After half the station finished guffawing at my blunder and I picked up the cake it left this:

Which pretty much sent all the men back into fits of laughter as they decided it looked like a big fat piece of poo on the floor. So, they all started making jokes.

And one officer wanted to add to the effect (much to the delight of the other officers):

That's toilet paper in case you're not quite envisioning his masterpiece. Of course, their 5 year old kid glee was complete when he acted like he was gonna lick a piece of it...

To be fair, I was laughing just as hysterically as they were. I blame my lunatic hysteria on sun deprivation and lack of any outdoor contact in more than 17 hours. The officers? Well, they had no excuse other than they are all overgrown boys at times.

Which can be quite entertaining when you've had a long day and you're tired and you just wanna relax a little. Sometimes immaturity and delirium are just what the Dr. ordered.

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